My favorite season

The air is crisp.
The sky is clear or perfectly grey.
Generally i could go on and on but today i'm having trouble finding the words.
I'm turning 30 tomorrow without you. These things have a way of creeping up on me. My favorite season fraught with the sadness of happy times that im slowly forgetting. Happy times i will try to make with Julia as she grows. My daughter will never know you but through stories. She'll only ever see your pictures. It will be tough to explain to her why i seem so sad during a time when i should not be.
I wish i could put my memories of us in a jar for safe keeping. They're in danger in my mind. I don't visit them as often as i should...i'm sorry.
Im turning 30 and you aren't here to make fun of me :) You'll be 29 at the end of the month, i'll have a drink for you...maybe i'll visit your grave. 7 years and i still haven't made it up there...sorry some more.
My favorite season and i cant wait for it to be over.