Children don't solve problems. They put them on hold while compounding them. The issues that existed before don't magically go away.
Parents begin to raise them. Begin to disagree. Begin to remember old wounds. Remember their own feelings again.
They supply tension.
The child absorbes.
They supply arguments.
The child absorbes.
When they argue from shear unhappiness, even love becomes a conflict and the child becomes a weapon.
No longer essential to a family unit now divided. The child disconnects and the weapon is forged. The child wins affection through manipulation, just like you taught it to. The child uses you as a weapon against yourself.
It takes years of therapy to undo all your mistakes but leaves a deep scar.
I have been this weapon. I cannot let this happen to my child. I worry much.
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